The Smartphones and Multitasking

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There’s a habit to attempt to multitask these days, which are kind of silly. I/you can sit in front of the TV but your hand tinkering with an i Pad/smart phones, half see the movies and half you play with it. Yes, I do it! Sometimes when I read some book or watching TV, I multitask – watch and I can’t keep my mind away from my smart phones and of course I miss the best part of the TV show!
And sometimes talking on the phone/texting while driving, checking email, update status on Facebook or Twitter and sometimes multitasking at the dinner table. My smartphones are in my hand before I even know what I’m searching for and never too far from my hand! The phone became the first things I saw in the morning and the last thing I touched just before falling asleep. Some people, maybe was annoyed with the way I used my phones. “Put your phone away while we’re eating!” all the parents always yelling like that to their kids/teenager and I 
Smartphones have made things worse. Yeah, I feel the urge to grab my phone to check social networks, texts, phone calls, or even play a game while I’m in public with friends/parents/coworker (sometimes when I have the meeting).
The internet, smartphones, i Pad or iPhone (what ever device name!) is pretty awesome because we have information on it and connect to the internet. But being multitasking and annoying is really bad. And for the last few days, there’s no browse on my smartphone. The first day is really tough! (The first day, I accidentally left my smartphone in my office ). The temptation of being online to snap the phone is really hard. I can’t check email, checking Twitter, checking the news. And deep in my heart, I was wondering if something interesting was happening anywhere in the world and wondering if anybody was thinking about me and send some IM or BlackBerry Messenger. I change my habit, yes I can. And it’s making me realize that so much work, so many thing I can do while I not distraction with my smart phone. I can finish read some novel, I can enjoy the TV series without miss the best part of it!

39 The Lucky Number :)

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39 is the best number? Yeah for pregnant women 39 is a good week because the baby is waiting for great the world! At 39 weeks the baby is ready to give birth as a new born! 39th week of pregnancy is more important than ever.

I ‘m turn to 39 years old today. Is not a short time! Even I wonder where all the time goes? But it’s just a day I’m absolutely just not looking forward to. I’m getting older and a lot of most things I miss about being younger. I had mixed feeling and I admitted I had not thought about it much until I turn 39th. The body really starts changing and it is a little bit scary. My eyesight is weaker, knees creakier and of course there are hairs growing where I never did before. This hasn’t happened overnight, but yeah turning 39 made aging all seem very real. 

But today, I completely surprised myself that I’m happier than I’ve been at any times in my life. Life goes on, sometimes for the better and life is completely complicated. It’s time for me to begin re-thinking my whole life. And I try to make a bucket list of 39 things I wanted to do before I’m turning to 40th next year (I hope I can do it). The most important is being positive and take things as it comes by!

Live was teaching me a lot of things – about life, love, happiness, sadness, fear, joy, friendship and yeah the list will never end. I’m getting older and there are things that happen almost every day to remind me of the fact that I must be grateful with what I have and the life I have. Thank you God for my life, the health, family and friends.

Officially today is my birthday and I have a feeling it’s going to be the best day. So many simple things I can do today and the most important this question popping into my mind: What does my happiness feel like?

Me : Time to Move on

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Frankly, I felt like – dumped, betrayed, rejection, avoiding and left so heartbroken!
My relationship seems to be going nowhere! It’s been over 18 months I try to build the relationship with him. And I took so much hope on this relationship that it will be the best and working, I have been adjusting myself to him and on this relationship. We both know that this relationship is never getting into high level, we only a good friend! But I was stupid enough because I’m involved my heart and feeling! I wait too long and think he’s going to change. Well… It’s always complicated with the feeling!
Over 3 months we didn’t seeing each other, there’s always some execute every time we try to meet – but I do fine about that as long as we still communication every day. And here come the time when my emotion getting high. Several days ago I saw him with a girl on my way to the office, I tried to follow/catch his car – like detective :) but I was running late to the office. I ask him and he said I was hallucinating! After that we have never spoken, I try to reach him trough the text, but he never replays all my messages! Did am too bad, so he avoiding me? Did I do screw up?
Should I cut him? YES, I have been cut all the connection with him, on my phone book, whats app, blackberry messages and on Skype. At least I’m not tempted to texting or call him first and is more easier for me to forget him!
The time is here where my decisions based upon my intuition – it’s a perfect time. So many learn I got from his relationship – and it’s time to move on.
Well, it’s really over now. I’ve made decisions that’s is over now. Only me, myself, knowing whether I should break up with him, thought it was so awful, but I felt some peace (although I’m crying now) because finally I can move forward and no longer stuck. Is a right time to take the leap. Why I should chasing something emptiness? Why is taking a long time for me to make those decisions? Let it be my best memories :) Time will heals all wounds…..

Sick and Tired, Bored With Feeling Sick!

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I haven’t been doing a very good job of keeping up with this blog lately. I felt that the burden of the jobs and life is over my shoulder. Work has been really busy and my relationship still the same nothing special – always stuck and I felt everything went wrong. The stress/anxiety/depression from being stuck is taking with me – physically, mentally, and emotionally. It’s feeling like I’ve been living my life on auto-pilot. Get up, go to work, complain about everything, go to bed, repeat. Yes, I’ve had some good days thrown in there, but I’ve also had some pretty horrible ones, too. Most days, however, feel more like nothing. Like I’m sitting, waiting – for the prospect of one, to be laid off, or to reach my breaking point and I’m trying to make a change!
Am I stressing? Yes…… and my stress makes me sick! Thursday I had a little bit of fever and headache that I ignore – I still went to office like usual, but at the noon the fever and headache getting worse. Yeah for that moment – I felt quite ill, felt so tired and weak. Stayed in bed at night and spent the last 12 hours with painkillers, but it’s not working out. Fever – headache – sore throat. I just want to curl up on the couch, wrapped and surrounded by warmth. Sleep more than I normally do. Turn off my phone and not spoken with anyone on blackberry messenger and MSN. I really need some sleep and some rest. My mother makes me some hot tea and soup but I can’t eat that – I can’t keep food down, it’s felt these foods are too hard to eat.
Yeah feel tired and sick, tired of getting sick and weak! But I feel so pampered because on a normal day – I’m constantly on the go. I give myself permission to go back to the things of childhood – my mother kept me home from school and took care of me. During the day I either curl up in bed on the couch and I watch movies. And I will pick up something very light because I don’t want to think about anything, sleep as much as I can and I fall asleep during the movies and it’s okay.
Bored with feeling sick and hope that’s I’m well soon! And is a time for me to manage my stress and I am still trying to figure out what is wrong with me?
Are stress and sick can make me to hallucinations? Hmmmmm 