Onesided Love Relationship

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Loving someone is not an easy thing, is a hard work and need a lot of understanding. Love is a greater force in the universe. And there is no logical explanation for it and sometimes is so complicated feeling when we talk about love and there is no definite formula or hard rules when it comes to relationship.
Love relationship and any kind relationship is give and take, willing to give, to connect and being able to completely trust. But how if the relationship become one sided? How if you/me not a priority only an option & backup plan??
And in my experience with love life, love is not only the word you said, but it’s more like something to do with the word Love. We have to do what we are comfortable with so know our boundaries and don’t waver, there is some man who’ll say: I will love you and will respect my opinions, some man who’ll say: I will provide you with what you need (not just financial but what we really need emotionally, physically, sexually and spiritually). But there’s a time or situation when my patience gets tested, the time when my phone calls or texting messages being overlooked/ignored . And there’s a time when our relationship became some option because he is too busy with work/business life. Or when togetherness became the silent time because he always busy with the laptop and the phone calls!!
I’ve learned in my own personal situation – that no matter how much I make someone a priority in my life, if he only treats me as an option all I need is to run as fast as I can. I don’t care how good of a person he is! But if they don’t realize how special I’m/you are – don’t even waste your time. A person can’t remotely even say the words “I Love You” and makes me became an exclusive/special for a while, but it’s needed a whole life. And I’ve learned not to be afraid of leaving or just simply saying goodbye. I can’t make someone stay in my life! The relationship only can last as long as both parties want to involve.
Life is too short to play with someone else emotion. I’m the type to just walk away and leave it and forget it (well actually need a time to forget it). I don’t want wasting my energy into one-sided love relationship! So…. If anyone out there have the same experience with me, all of that will teach you to know what you do and don’t want, and it will teach you for becoming a strong person. Believe that the right one will come along. Love will waiting 

Build My Defense

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Things that’s popping into my mind “will your relationship last a lifetime? Will you and your partner enjoy each other for as long as you both shall live?” – It’s tricky question I guess :). Most of us know that the fairy tale happily ever after stories are full of holes (so does with mine lol……)
Some relationship ending with some errors of judgment – fighting and making up in the end. There’s always ups and downs of maintaining. The relationship itself is difficult and the outcome uncertain. If the relationship is going to work, it will require compromise or sometimes end up in some ways! To be honest – sometimes it’s hard for me to understand the thought & to understand the feeling and to know how I feel. Even when it comes to the feeling I don’t normally put rules on them!
Yeah, sometimes life break me, the relationship or the love life is going nowhere, and the love I felt became broken – betrayed – left and hurting…… nobody can protect me from that (and I swallowed up)! Only myself can protect me. Yes, I have to love and I have to feel the love because it is the reason we’re on earth. I can definitely relate to this. But getting hurts in many times makes me think that I should build the wall so high, that no one could climb it! Yes, I build my defense. My wall will protect me from getting hurt, betrayed, abandoned, or any other negative feeling. And every time I just keep my wall more higher!

Bullying and Ignored at Workplace

ignore

I haven’t blogged much lately, a lot has been going on with my life and certain things have fallen by the wayside. Recently, I have been thinking a lot about life, especially my workplace life. I have spent a lot of time at my workplace – almost 40 hours each week. No wonder office is like home for me. I love my jobs. But sometimes I had problems with being bullied and ignored at work!
There is a time when I was ignored (actually being ignored is more worse than being bully).  They aren’t making eye contact with me in a meeting or in a lunch time, but making eye contact with everyone else. Even they not speak at all to me. It’s felt really hurt, sad, stressed. And makes me think – what’s wrong with me? I always try to be direct and honest, and when I’m saying things about the truth and they don’t want to hear – no need a time they will ignore me.
As I remembered this situation start when I became the last person to find out about the holiday schedule, all co-workers discussing something in an unofficial capacity, but they haven’t asked my opinion. And it goes until today! Being ignored, left out and pushed aside day by day. They will repeat ignoring! It’s sad when people I know become people I knew. The social rules of the workplace are a pretty complicated and life is already complicated too.
Should I resign from my jobs! NOOOOOOOO – I love my jobs and this situation makes me become a strong person. In general, I like who I am and the negative influences in my lives is just as important as the positive ones (I will keep myself protected). I laugh at the people (coworkers) who was bullying and ignore me, and I feel sorry for them at the same time, because one day they will feel the same way too!! The truth will rise to the top and keep shining.
Bullying and ignores happens for many reasons, some people have two faced and disgustingly fake. It is sad that people who are grown act so immaturely in a work environment!

They ignore me now, i know one day they need me :) #unknown quotes

The Smartphones and Multitasking

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There’s a habit to attempt to multitask these days, which are kind of silly. I/you can sit in front of the TV but your hand tinkering with an i Pad/smart phones, half see the movies and half you play with it. Yes, I do it! Sometimes when I read some book or watching TV, I multitask – watch and I can’t keep my mind away from my smart phones and of course I miss the best part of the TV show!
And sometimes talking on the phone/texting while driving, checking email, update status on Facebook or Twitter and sometimes multitasking at the dinner table. My smartphones are in my hand before I even know what I’m searching for and never too far from my hand! The phone became the first things I saw in the morning and the last thing I touched just before falling asleep. Some people, maybe was annoyed with the way I used my phones. “Put your phone away while we’re eating!” all the parents always yelling like that to their kids/teenager and I 
Smartphones have made things worse. Yeah, I feel the urge to grab my phone to check social networks, texts, phone calls, or even play a game while I’m in public with friends/parents/coworker (sometimes when I have the meeting).
The internet, smartphones, i Pad or iPhone (what ever device name!) is pretty awesome because we have information on it and connect to the internet. But being multitasking and annoying is really bad. And for the last few days, there’s no browse on my smartphone. The first day is really tough! (The first day, I accidentally left my smartphone in my office ). The temptation of being online to snap the phone is really hard. I can’t check email, checking Twitter, checking the news. And deep in my heart, I was wondering if something interesting was happening anywhere in the world and wondering if anybody was thinking about me and send some IM or BlackBerry Messenger. I change my habit, yes I can. And it’s making me realize that so much work, so many thing I can do while I not distraction with my smart phone. I can finish read some novel, I can enjoy the TV series without miss the best part of it!